Valentine’s Day: trash or treasure?

Valentine’s Day: trash or treasure?

Unpopular opinion incoming: for me, Valentine’s Day is trash. Let me explain myself: although for me every day is Valentine’s Day, I hate the materialism that comes with it. An overload of flowers, chocolates or gifts is one thing, but an overcrowded Meir, hundreds of online packages, lame and corny marketing, big slogans with little content, wanting more and more and more. All of that in the name of love? No thanks, I’m out!

Eva Hendrickx

Is that really what liking each other is about? Perhaps a dash of history about the origins of Valentine’s Day might help to get back to its value. Hop on the loveboat with me towards …

… the sixth century B.C., when a Pagan festival took place on February 15 (?!). Valentine’s Day is said to be a derivative of the Roman Lupercalia festival, in honor of the god of fertility. The names of unmarried young women were thrown into a large bowl. When it was their turn, the young unmarried men at the festival could draw a name. The two then formed a couple for the rest of the festval. Not a bad concept if you ask me, maybe just a little outdated? Meeting new people, throwing a party together, celebrating life and love? Count me in!
We travel further through time to the third century A.D. to a legend that tells the story of a priest named Valentinus. He was known for his gift of healing the sick and elderly. One day he restored sight to the blind daughter of the mayor of Rome. As a sign of gratitude, the mayor converted to Christianity and released all the prisoners in Rome. So might the value of forgiveness be at the root of Valentine’s Day? Valentine’s Day as a time to forgive our exes…the world would be a much nicer place (or not).

© Fien Dierckx

Our loveboat docks in that same third century A.D. for a meeting with emperor Claudius II. He wished for a large army, but many of his men refused to join the army because they wanted to marry their wives. Claudius was at a loss and decided to ban marrying soldiers. But this was beyond priest Valentine, who married young couples against the rules and paid for it with death. So Valentine literally gave his life for love… And Saint Valentine was a romantic, as he proved once again right before his death. Just before his execution, he secretly wrote a message to someone he fell in love with in the cell. He signed the note with “From your Valentine”. On February 14, he was executed. Don’t we also sign our anonymous love letters on Valentine’s Day with “Your Valentine”? Not that anonymous anyway! I remember: protest, standing up for what you believe in, sticking to your values and standards, loving each other to death and fighting spirit as the basis of this beautiful Valentine’s story.

© Fien Dierckx

Fast forward, our ship heists the sails toward our time. As so often, explanations are sought in mother nature. All birds lay an egg in May, but according to some sources, the mating dance of many species in our nature begins as early as February. People also perform that dance on February 14, and I support that! But, do we really thank our mother earth by buying things we don’t need? By participating in a capitalist party with marketing? By normalizing mass consumption once again? I don’t think so!
Daring to stand up for what you value in life, celebrating life and love, meeting each other, thanking nature for all it gives us. That’s what Valentine’s Day has historically stood for.
So, yes, Valentine’s Day is trash. And yet, for me, every day is Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Day in the old fashioned way. Loving each other, everyone and everything, and life, most of all. Celebrating too, every day. Holding each other tightly and not letting go, getting on the barricade and exclaiming what you are fighting for, that too. Declaring how beautiful life is and how beautiful love can be. Not only each other, but also yourself. Because at the end of the day, it is you yourself who may be honored today. Your brain drags you through every task, your legs carry you and make you explore the world, your personality that lights up every day in the lives of those you love. Happy Valentine’ s Day!

© Fien Dierckx

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